Friday, June 7, 2013

Some Extra Thoughts

A whole five days in a row of posting without writing prompts???? I have to say, I'm pretty proud of myself. Maybe I'm on my way to being one of the cool bloggers now.

Although- we do need to give some credit to Game of Thrones and awkward baby showers.

Speaking of baby showers, I have more to say about it.

One element of the shower that was a bit different was that someone came up and gave a devotion. I was a little surprised at this, but I really shouldn't have been. With this circle of women, it's pretty common to have a short devotion at a party or gathering of some sort. At first I wasn't sure how I would feel, since it would be directed at mothers. Which it was, and I'm not one or going to be one anytime soon.

However, there were two things she said that stuck out to me.



The first was, she reflected on a thought the soon-to-be-mommy gave at a Bible study once. She had said "I pray that my home is God-centered, not baby centered."

When I heard this, I gave an inner sigh of relief. I have no doubts my friend will be a great mom. She's going to be wonderful - but it warmed my heart to hear this. Practically living on the internet can give you a warped view of moms sometimes. With Facebook friends, Instagram, and mommy-blogs galore, a lot of times I get the impression that some of these moms (and some of them are people I know) almost worship their children. Every single thing I see from them is about how amazing their kid is and every tiny detial.

Maybe it's because I'm not a mom and I "don't get it." I realize this is probably true. But at the same time, I can't help but wonder when we cross the line between "excited and supportive mom" to "worshipping my child."

Pardon my over-use of comparing my life to Sex and the City... but I feel like this moment in the baby shower episode (Season1, ep 10) is a great example:


Random Mom: I love my son. Andy is 11 months old. He is a god, and I tell him so every day.

Carrie: Thirty years from now, what do you think the chances are... that some woman's gonna be able to make Andy happy?

But it's not just about babies. Think about other things in life. Careers, relationships, possession, blogs... when do we lose sight of what's the most important? Not that some of these things are not important. They are! Our homes should be focused on our families and everything. That's a good thing! But I can't help but wonder where we draw the line...

Another thing that stood out to me from the devotion was: "Don't let non-moral issues become moral issues."

In conservative Christian circles, this happens a lot. She of course talked about this in the context of being a mom- picking schools, organic or non-organic food for my kid, etc. So many times in these circles, people tend to run to their Bible and try to find the perfect "God-centered" answer.

The thing is - with these questions the Bible isn't going to tell you which school to send your child to. It's just not.

And that's okay.

She pointed out that the way each family raises their child and the choices they make are all going to be different. For some people, choosing a private school is the best choice for their child. For others, public school is the best. Either one is fine! Each family is different.

It was so refreshing to hear this. Although I know this already- it's nice to be reminded. Sometimes there is a pressure to have your life look a certain way, or that God has a specific way that you should do things.

Not always. When they are non-moral issues - don't make them moral issues. If your life looks different than someone else's... that's okay.

So... those were just some thoughts floating around in my head this week. Turns out baby showers aren't always that bad. :-)

6 comments:

  1. I agree 100%. We tend to over spiritualize everything. There's nothing wrong with praying for God's direction, but there are times when I feel like God is saying "You've got this, go ahead!"

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    1. Exactly. And it's not that God doesn't have a hand in some of those choices- he does sometimes. But it's not like when you're making a choice about what to eat you'll open your Bible and there will be a verse to tell you what to do.

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  2. Love, love, love, love this. For realz. I'm not a mom either, although hopefully fairly close. However, I do worry/pray about this "child worshiping" thing. Kids are great, I get that, and they are going to totally change your life. BUT- I still want to be me, and I want to focus on providing a good upbringing (including spiritually) more than an individual child, if that makes sense. Sounds like this mom-to-be has a great outlook!

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    1. Yeah! I knew she would be a great mom, but hearing that made me feel better. And you'll be a great mom too someday!

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  3. I'm not a mom, but as a teacher im always around children. I see the negative effects of "worshiping" your child...it isn't pretty....even in 6th grade. Loving your child and supporting them is important, but I feel that the whole point of patenting is to prepare your child to be able to function as an adult in the world without you. Therefore, simply being a good example and supporting your child is wonderful. There is such a difference between the kids who are loved and those that are worshiped (who are also never held accountable for their actions)....sorry for the rant. Schools put, but I still have summer school! Lol

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    1. It's so true! I see it too and it gets so frustrating because you can tell who is running the house and it makes things so dysfunctional and crazy.

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