When Life is on Pause

There are times in life you feel stuck. Day in and day out you experience the same things over and over again. Things aren't going the way you want them to. Maybe you apply and interview for job after job after job and nothing happens. Or you go on a dating site and talk to as many guys (or girls) as you can and meet some of them and go on dates. Sometimes it even goes past a first date. But then something happens and it falls through. Again. 

We all get into these life ruts. Where we're just stuck and we don't know how to get out. Time moves slower and keeps going on but it doesn't feel like it's going anywhere. We aren't going anywhere. While the days keep going and the months and seasons change, it still feels as though life has been put on pause and no one is pressing the play button. Everyone is moving, but you're just staying still.

But time is a funny thing.

Things in life can change in the blink of an eye. Sometimes for the worse, sometimes better. Just this past weekend I had to go to Indiana with my mom for a wake and a funeral for a relative. She had been diagnosed with cancer a few years ago, but just in the past week or two she seemed to be doing great. Then... she wasn't. In the blink of an eye, the family's life had changed.

But it's not always that way. Sometimes it changes for the better. These are the moments I try to think about when I'm in a rut.

I think about my sister. In just a little over a month she's going to be married. All of the planning and preparations will be over and she'll be married. It's crazy to think about. They've known each other/been dating for about three years now. Which in the grand scheme of things isn't all that long, but it's not as though they met and got married a month later. But, she has told me she knew pretty early on in the relationship he was "the one." They hadn't even been dating a year - maybe not even six months - and they both knew where it was going to go. It all happened pretty fast. It doesn't for all people, but for them it did.

Or I think about a good friend of mine who just began a new job. On a whim she applied for a job in another city. By the end of the month she had a new apartment and a new job in a new city and was making new friends. 

These are the types of stories I try to keep in mind when I'm in a life rut. Sometimes it might seem as though I'm stuck and going nowhere. It might feel like my life is on pause. But the play button could be hit at any moment and life could change quickly. 

Who knows what will happen in a month... a few months... a year from now?

It's exciting to think about - but also scary. We get used to those ruts sometimes. Because we know what will happen and how to handle it. But we don't always know how to handle new jobs, new relationships, new cities, or new lives. 

But isn't that part of what's so great about life changing? It's scary to think about not knowing what's up ahead, but I like that part in a way. Anything can happen. Anyone can pop up. New adventures are waiting down the road. 

We just have to keep hoping and waiting for when it'll happen. It will happen. It might not be in a big loud way. It might be a gradual thing. Where one day you wake up and realize "wow... I'm not where I was a few months ago." 

Or maybe we have to make it happen for ourselves sometimes. God doesn't always just throw something on your lap. Sometimes we have to get out of the rut on our own, and he's there with us along the way or guiding how we make those choices.

Sometimes it takes sending out that long shot job application. Sometimes it's just getting up and deciding "yes, I'll go to that party where I might not know many people." Or going on that first date you were nervous about. Or going on that dream vacation you always wanted.

Or maybe it's just being open to the possibilities. Even though we hate our life ruts and being on pause, we still stay closed up. It's amazing what can happen if we're just open to other things we don't expect.

Maybe it's time to press the play button and do something out of the ordinary. Because perhaps that change in life is just around the corner.

Bout of Books Update:

Wednesday/Thursday

Total number of books I've read: 2

Pages Read Yesterday/Today: 120

Total Pages Read: 430
Books: American Gods by Neil Gaiman, Anna Dressed in Blood  by Kendare Blake