Over the weekend I was talking with my sister, my aunt, and a friend about a situation my sister was in. She was frustrated about it and I tried to put it in a bit more of a positive light. She reacted by saying "Oh honey."
You know... How I Met Your Mother style.
After a short discussion we changed subjects and the night went on. However, my sister's reaction to my statement stuck with me. Usually things like this don't bother me, but this time it did. (Things have been cleared up since then and it's all good - just fyi!)
It got me to thinking. Why is it that when people try to see something positive or the good side of others, they are considered naive and their opinion is generally not taken seriously?
I see this happen over and over again with various topics. From discussing people, to situations, to world issues, to even books and movies. In theory, we love people who are positive. I think of the famous quote by Anne Frank: "Despite everything, I think that people are really good at heart." We hear this and we're all "She's so inspiring! She's so strong! How awesome is that?!"
But if Anne Frank wasn't you know... Anne Frank... and just another girl and we were sitting in at a coffee shop complaining about people and life and she said that, our reaction would probably be more... "Oh, honey." We'd think it was a sweet and cute statement, but probably wouldn't take it very seriously.
Or what about books, movies, and TV shows. If a story doesn't have death, jaded characters, and such, it's not considered realistic and not always taken as seriously. If a story has a happy ending, sometimes it's seen as being cliche.
When talking about hot topics we are always complaining about the world and the state of our culture. People who criticize such things are usually seen as intelligent because they can point out flaws. But when someone sees positive things in the world, culture, and pop culture, they aren't as informed or educated.
Why is this the case?
It's so easy for us to complain, to see bad things around us, to see how awful people can be, etc. In a way, it's harder to see the positive side of things. So why is it that when people tend to be positive, they're seen more as naive?
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for being informed about the world and seeing things realistically, and there are moments for "Oh Honey..." But that doesn't mean I should assume everything is awful.
For example: when I hang out with my friends downtown we try as much as we can to travel in groups and my friends who live there always walk me to my car to be safe. These are smart things to do. However, that doesn't mean I think every person I come across is going to attack me. Generally, I think everyone is just trying to do their own thing.
There are bad things and bad people in the world - but does that mean we should automatically assume everything and everyone is bad? I don't think so.
I don't know about you, but I would rather others assume I'm a kind person than a jerk. Shouldn't we try to do the same for others?
What do you all think? Is it just me, or do you see this trend as well?
Also- I'm starting a Facebook Book Club called The Book Worms! We're planning on starting our first book in September but we're still deciding on how often we'll "meet" and what to read. If you want to join the group click this link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1464666840456806/
Wheeeeeee! I asked to join the group...I need to be in more book clubs; it will help me immensely in my library-ing!
ReplyDeleteYay! I'm so glad you're in the group!
DeleteI get where you are coming from. Lately I have been trying to be more positive and seroiusly cut down on stress, but it seems like people just don't want that. It's almost like others aren't happy until you are whining and complaining along side them...maybe it's the whole misery loves company thing? Either way, I say- good for you for being positive!
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure I'm the naive idiot who assumes everyone is nice most of the times until I get screwed over. But it's something I like about myself because I see the opposite in my Nana who is just so distrustful of everyone. I don't want that, not at all.
ReplyDeleteThat's how I feel too! I know a lot of people who tend to not trust anyone, and I don't want to be that way. I know I can get hurt and such in the process, but not letting anyone in or trusting anyone makes you miss out on so many awesome things and people in life!
DeleteYou're right, and we definitely need more positivity in the world. And happy endings rock. There are times, though, where I'd rather just have people sympathize with me than try to solve the problem.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I totally feel ya there! We all have those times when we just want to vent and not a solution. But I think there's a difference between that and looking down on someone because they have a more positive outlook. Does that make sense?
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